Buffalo Portrait

Orville Stonker

 

In Anthroxville's grand cacophony of sticky fingers, Orville Stonker orchestrates with unparalleled panache. This anthro buffalo, the unrivaled maestro of misappropriation, elevates thievery to such dizzying heights it leaves lesser burglars weeping into their lockpicks.

 

Born (or rather, stolen) into a world where ownership is as fleeting as sobriety at Erm Wotsischops’ Knotted Knacker, Orville's destiny was etched in purloined silver. Legend whispers that he was snatched from his incubator, then promptly re-snatched at a red light, his infancy a merry-go-round of abduction that would make even Penelope Snizzsnapper's head spin.

 

In a city where burglars come home to find themselves burgled, Orville stands apart, a colossus of kleptomania. His heists are so audacious, so beautifully executed, that victims often feel honored to be robbed by him. It's said he once lifted Gilbert Jitterbug's entire coffee table while Gilbert was still reading the newspaper on it, leaving behind only a thank-you note and a sense of awe.

 

But Orville's true genius lies in his philosophical approach to thievery. After a particularly invigorating evening of ransacking (Spackle Knockabout's pad was a particular triumph), he found himself pondering the very nature of ownership. In a flash of insight more blinding than Jackson Jiffy's most potent concoctions, Orville realized he wasn't just stealing objects – he was liberating them from the tyranny of permanence.

 

As Anthroxville's possessions play musical chairs at a dizzying pace, Orville remains the tempo-setter, the grand choreographer of this larcenous ballet. In a world where everything is borrowed and nothing is truly owned, he stands as a beacon of twisted integrity, a reminder that in Anthroxville, the only constant is change – and the certainty that whatever you have will soon be in someone else's sticky-fingered grasp...

 

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